23. salam eidulfitri..

haip..! ehee..aslmkm..

1 more day to go to syawal eid, but rite now im stil here sitting on my beloved chair in OFFICE..ehheehe..
i'll be here till tomorrow morning.. why? coz i still have to work tonite till 7 am tomorrow, means i'll only be headed to kota tinggi johor at the morning of aidilfitri..huhuuhu..

tp..emm xkisah la, sama je as long as my present at 1 syawal ada, tu pn da cukup..lg pn this year celebration wont be the same anymore.. it will be much different, biasa pagi2 raya org yg plg awal mandi n wangi2, dressed well up..be the most handsome guy at the eidulfitri morning would be my beloved late-father.. dia selalu pesan, jgn tinggalkn mandi sunat pagi raya, tuhan tu Maha pemurah, coz even just mandi utk pagi raya pn ada ganjarannya..jgn di sia-siakn.. selalu pesan kalau nk awet muda n nmpk kekal cantik, jgn tinggal mandi sunat pagi raya, n of course wudu'..

cant help it but have to admit, nurin yg plg bongsu, manje.. da besar2 pn he will still have to wake me up n remind me to go to mandi sunat, n pakai cantik2..mom is always be the one who most simple.. terbalik, sbb mak nurin x brape amik kisah pasal kecantikan n presentable thingy, bpk nurin yg suka selalu look tidy n clean.. always wanna look good, then after solat sunat raya, nnt salam2 mintak maaf, bpk nurin ske bergurau, wlpn anak2 da besar da keje, da beranak pinak.. dia still akan sediakan duit raya but soang singgit je la utk anak2 dia, cucu2 dia bg byk ehehe.. but im the youngest, he will always give me double compared to others.. double means..i'll get rm 2 lah.. :)

just rm2..but it means too much, biasa nya nurin tak mau guna duit raya tu, simpan baik2.. syg.. sbb? its worth more than the whole world..its symbolize his love to me is double too..he always tell me, the most happiest day he ever had in his whole life was when i born.. selalu sgt dia ulang cerita subuh 26syawal1404 (25july1984).. he was so nervous waiting outside of the labor room, exactly at 5.55am he heard me crying.. masuk2 dia terkejut, yg kuar bayi 3kg da bukak mata n rambut kerinting.. he said he dont know but he cant describe the happiness at that morning..too much happiness n smpai besar pn dia kata nurin anak bayi dia..hmm..=)

hmm i'll missed him forever.. frankly speaking, yup i do missed him too much everyday, rindu sgt tp nurin x rasa nurin cukup kuat lg utk menziarah kuburnya di pagi raya nt, hanya doa dr jauh mampu nurin beri, sbb tu nurin sngaje x amik cuti utk 30hb, i just dont want to go there.. i cant help it, but at the last time when i send him there..looking at the grave..n imaging my dad was buried in that.. he was down there alone.. the strenght seems like fading too fast.. mom told me to not to cry if i love him, give him doa' n yassin as much as i can..n for the whole day i tried so hard to not to cried, but looking at his final place..makes me weaker..
its not that i cant accept it, it just im not too strong yet.. nurin redha.. berdoa semoga dia berbahagia disana..al-fatihah..amin..

am crying while writing this but whatever it is, i have to keep the smile for mom tomorrow.. she seem to be the most stronger person for this, x nmpk dia mnangis but deep down i know....



p/s: to everybody, thanks for all the wishes..n sori tak sme nurin balas, tade mood sgt nk create kad raya tahun ni.. salam aidilfitri maaf zahir batin to all too..

to my family, i love each one of u too much, thanks for everything, salam aidilfitri, maaf zahir batin, halalkan sme makan minum ucu n segala2nye...

and....
specially to anak-anak sedare makcu yg beratur pjg tu..maaf zahir batin ye.. atas kesilapan teknikal terlupe raya da dekat..thn ni makcu x dpt tuka duit raye kt bank..seyes! huhuuuhu...err tp..yela2..da diam2 jgn nanges..! sbb syg korang pnye pasal, makcu sanggup korek tabung siput makcu tu tahu?? seb baik cukup.. duit laye x wangi ler thn ni ye..x bau bank..but do remember..the sincerity n the love thats count..! salam aidilfitri....